One of the scariest moments in my life happened to me about 24 hours ago. That moment when you are almost at the finish line, and then BAM!!! SMACK!!! BOOM!!!
BANG!!! Everything blacked out for a moment. Was I dead? Did I close my eyes? Right before that moment of seeing nothing, I knew what was going to happen. And there was no way of getting out of it.
I looked to the right of me, there was my oldest son who was sitting in the passenger seat. "OH, SHIT!!! After what felt like an eternity, I was able to see my life flash before my eyes, and ask myself if my kids will have a mother and if my oldest son and I were going to make it out of this alive. And then, it was as if I left my body and was jolted back into it.
Moments later, there was light again, and the smell of smoke. We had to get out of the car. I turned to the right again, and my son was right there. He was okay. The other two were in the back seat. Out loud I said, "we need to get out. There's smoke filling the car". I opened the door, my oldest came out after me from my side. I quickly opened the back door to get my other two kids out. Quickly, get to the side of the road where it was safer. Minutes later, the police officers and the firemen showed up. Also, some wonderful strangers came to my rescue to help me with my children. It was cold, and their jackets were in the car. They stayed with me until my partner showed up; and kept my kids warm in their car. There are still good people in this world.
It was gratitude that my three babies were alive that kept me sane and calm. Because deep down, I wanted to beat the shit out of that person who turned right in front of me and hit us. I wanted to yell at her and beat some sense into her. But I didn't do any of those things. My focus was on my children. They were safe. Not a scratch. Not a bruise.
Their response was the following, "Mommy! What about my phone, my toys, our stuff."
I responded, "those are just things, they can be replaced. What is important is that everyone was okay."
"Mommy, does this mean you have to get a new car?"
To make light of the situation, "Sure, what kind of a car do you want?"
They were distracted. They were safe. They were happy. They are loved.
Less than five minutes to our destination, the driver who hit me decided to make a turn as I was approaching. I was unable to anticipate their move, considering that I was going straight on the highway and they were coming in the opposite direction. Perhaps, I could have because two cars prior made turns enough distance ahead of me. I did all I could, stepped on the brakes, turn the wheel a bit so the impact would not get my son. I can rewind the scenario over and over. Could I have avoided this accident? No.
However, the lesson is more than that life is unpredictable. That shit happens in the calm, shit happens in the storm, and shit can happen at any moment in life. The question is: what are you going to do about it? And in some cases: You can't do anything about what took place. However, you can respond the best you can. And at that moment, I was alive, all three of my kids were alive and nothing else mattered. No-thing mattered but them. And we were together. And that filled me with so much gratitude that it overcame my anger, it overcame my fear. I was just grateful. Knowing that it was the grace of God, Divine Intervention, Allah, Creatrix, and the Universe. We were still together, we are still here.
We were able to get the stuff out of my car and recover our things. But I had what mattered most. My loves.
After, we were home safe and warm. Still in a bit of shock, but definitely with my mind intact. Part of me wanted to blame the other driver for what she did. She was definitely at fault. However, it could have happened to any of us. It just takes that one moment. That one moment of unawareness and BANG! The biggest mistake could be that mistake in which we cannot dig our way out, in which a second chance may not come. At this particular moment was a BANG! And it was a lesson we can all learn from. To slow down, to bring awareness to the things we are doing. To love and appreciate the people who love and support us. We had another chance, a do-over. This was our wake-up. To live. The things that were lost can be replaced. However, the people in our lives cannot; and this wasn't one of those situations.
This moment also brought about another lesson, I could have kept this accident to myself. However, I needed support. I needed to know that I had people who cared about me and that I was okay. That I had someone to talk to about my experience. And so, I reached out. You see, at times we may think that nobody is there for us or nobody may care. However, the question is: are you reaching out, are you sharing what you're going through? Are we allowing and opening our hearts to receive support, love, and help? When we do reach out, we may surprise ourselves and realize that there are a lot more people there for us than we thought. We have to trust, and allow them to bless us with the gift of being there for us. Don't block the blessings. It comes in so many forms.
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